19th November 06

Sorry
I haven't written for a couple of days. Just hadn't had time and have been in shock since I saw Jan Leeming 'auditioning' for David Gest. PLEASE, PLEASE somebody else must have seen this. Did you see her singing Happy Talk and then Summertime? I literally was cringing. It was so awful. The most awful thing I have ever seen. Why did she do it? Even David was embaressed. The woman in general is very hard work. She just seems to jump down everyones throat and whinge all the time. What a shock she keeps getting the Bushtucker trials.

Corrie
Euwwww, Frankie and Jamie in bed. It'll be a good week this week and I'm so pleased Warren (this boy cannot act) is back. Another non character.
I know what Cilla's up to, but won't spoil it for Fran.
Becky - horrible.
Tracy - I'm falling for her likeable charm. Am I as gulliable as Claire?

X-Factor
I cannot believe those two little tadpoles are still in it. They are like children. And they aren't very good. Sorry to offend the whole of Scotland, but get them out.

Strictly Come Dancing
Who was voted out? Was it our mate Claire? Claire's fan we all miss you - please come back
xxxxxx

17th November 06

Gaffney
What a legend. I have a new found respect for this c-lister and his quest for fame. Nine stars. Better than Scott's pathetic attempt. Do you think Dean is almost good looking? It's like he's one gene away from being a sqare jawed rugged model. If you look at his face its nearly perfect except his eyes are a little too small and close together, his nose is slightly too big, teeth too crooked - I am a supermodel so can say these things. Maybe he could have an extreme makeover. Did anyone see Jade Goody's mum on that. Talk about extreme. She looked soooo different. I'd even go as far to say attractive. That show is amazing. I'm never sure if i'd having plastic surgery - I like the idea of a few lifts and tucks, it's just the surgery part. I've had enough opertations without willingly having one. I would have my teeth done though.
Anyway, Dean, looking forward to seeing him in there. I have a feeling he's going to be quite complex.

The Royal Wedding
Tom and Katie are apparently getting married in Italy tomorrow. I used to really fancy Tom Cruise, but just can't bear to look at him now. All our teen idols have turned a bit odd haven't they?

Solicitors
When John crashed our car we not only had to deal with the insurance and loss from the car but now people put in personal injury claims. We heard from this old hags solicitors withing 48hours, telling us about all her injuries. All made up. I think it's disgusting that when you have an accident with another person you can sue them. It's different if it's a company or LA but an individual... no wonder insurance premiums are so high.

Boys room
Finally made it a nursery. Only took a year. Curtians up, rug down. I've put up the certificate of the star we had named after Amy, so now all three of my babies can sleep together.

16th November 06

Christmas is coming
Had such a lovely day yesterday buying bits for Christmas. Last year the whole festive thing passed me by as I was pregnant at this time, then had the boys and then had to adjust to life with twins. Still adjusting and that'll probably go on for the next thirty years.
Bought lots of decorations. We're not having a tree this year as it will just get pulled over and I'll spend all of Christmas shouting 'Sam, NO!' Which in Sam world is the funniest thing ever. Mummy cross generally causes great hillarity to them both. Bought candle holders, lights etc. It'll look a right mess when I do it. I bought Woman and Home magazine the other day and marvelled at the Kelly Hoppen like Christmas Decors. A carefully placed bauble on the stair, the dinner plates bound with festive ribbon. Do people do this? Mmmm, probably. I don't normally by Woman and Home but they were out of Heat magazine.
It's so nice that the boys will be slightly more aware that something is going on and can have a little Christmas dinner. I've written to Father Christmas for them - I think you get a reply from the post office - and bought their stockings.

Mother of twins
Met my first miserable mother of twins yesterday. Normally when you see someone else with twins you have either a knowing nod of 'Oh my god, it's hard work isn't it?' or a little chat. Her's were three months old and she was with her parents who were very nice, but I seemed to just get on her nerves so I made a quick exit. On relaying the story to John, was advised that she may have been having a stressful day. Fair, but she'd better get used to them....there are plenty ahead!

Celebrity
I am not loving Jan Leeming at all. Nor Phina.

Rain
It's raining here at the moment and is really miserable. I have loads of cleaning to do - don't want Kim and Aggie knocking at the door.

Blogging
The more I write this, the more I feel it's a diary for me. I haven't kept a diary since I was 15, which was full of things like - I love Kieran or I love Sol or I hate Mr James or found science homework really hard. The innocence of it all.

Have a good day.
xxxx

14th November 06

Eastenders.
AS much as I don't like Ruby and her overacting with her flared nostrils, I can't stand the way Sean behaves. It's not the flirting or cheating but the pantomime way in which it's done. The raised eyebrows, stupid smirks. He looks like the hooded claw. All he needs is an evil laugh. And strangely I am compelled to watch him as I fancy him, because I'm shallow.
There seems to be alot of children in the programme at the moment. Maybe Sylvia Young were doing a two for one special. Not sure who a couple of them are. Poor little Ben. He looks like such an urchin and that anything bad could happen to him - he's bound to slip on a banana skin from the Fowlers stall.
Keith Miller looks a much slimmer. I saw him a while ago in Kingston and he'd lost weight then. I suppose a shave and a haircut would be out of the question. Worryingly, I think I would then find him attractive.
Dawn and her married man. Awful situation. She's right to make him decide. Is she sure she wants him that much? It's not easy - for anyone.

Celebrity
I've changed my mind. David Gest is going to win this. What a legend doing the bushtucker trail. I couldn't stop laughing. There's nothing about him I fancy.
I liked Lauren Booth realising that she took herself too seriously over the question to open the chest and admitting she should have apologised to DG. Maybe she'll come across as really likeable.

Want to write more, but have to got out. Maybe later.
x

13th November 06

Co-ron-nat-ion Streeeet
Couple of good ones last night.
I'm not sure about Tracy but I think I read somewhere that this niceness is false and is part of her plot to get back at Charlie. Fran don't read this next bit - I think someone gets killed in the new year and it involves the little love triangle Charlie had. Fran you can look now.
I quite like 'nice' Tracy and I like Claire when she talks to Tracy. Is Claire over her PND now? That all seems to have been dealt with nicely. Is she still on medication? I suppose the whole Fred thing has been on their minds.

I now feel sorry for Bev. When she knocked on Ashley's door it was so sad. Where does she go next? Why hasn't shelly come back to see her? Why hasn't she gone to see Shelly? Loved the comedy of Steve slagging her off and then realising she was behind him. Are we going to recapture some of the Bet and Alec comedy classics now that Liz and Steve are running the pub?

Bless poor Gail and her parenting class. Where have I seen the teacher before? Was he in Brookie or something? Thought the boy she was pretending was David whilst she said what she felt really played his role well and looked like a naughty teenager. I hope she can sort David out, he is looking as if he has the makings of a serial killer. Did anyone else cheer when Charlie kept dunking him in the bath?

Did you see Frankie when she stood up in the Rovers? They didn't even bother to conceal her bump. Poor old Jamie. She's playing a merry old game with him. How will it end? In tears, no doubt.

I'm a Celebrity.

Where do I start?

Before I get into any of it I have to say how much I admire those who bungeed out of the helicopter. I felt sick watching it. They were all amazing to do it.

I suppose the main topic has to be David Gest. I have never seen him in an interview. I find him grotesquely fascination. What an odd looking man too - the eys, the hair, the skin. The personality is just weird. What does he do? I only know him as Liza's ex, but I think he's something to do with showbiz in a big way. Let me know.

Jan Leeming - I think she's just going to get on my nerves in the same way Jennie Bond did. What is it about middle aged ex Beeb news people.

Toby Anstis - called HIMSELF the Tobster. Loose 10 points.

Mylene Class - don't like her, but think I might end up thinking she's ok.

Lauren Booth - not sure yet.

Matt Willis - This years Sid Owen?

Faith Brown - I do like her in the same way I like Freddie Starr and Cannon and Ball.

Bird from Footballers Wives - I don't think she's going to be my fave.

Scott Henshall - looks spiteful, might be fun.

Jason Donovan - lovely Jase. I think he'll win.

I didn't get to watch all of it, due to an ill baby, but saw Jan's Bushtucker trial. Can't really criticise as I wouldn't do any of them in a million years. Looking forward to tonight though - old wavey davey has to do it.

Ant and Dec - this is them at their best. Brilliant banter. I love them on this.

Daniel Craig.

I think I love him.

12th November 06

The Claire King Fan Club
I was well and truly told yesterday by a 'friend' (mmm, yeah right) of Claire King's, that she is a wonderful person and my comments were really nasty and if I was going to call somebody something then I should justify what I say. Well, I won't because I don't always want to. I'm entitled to my opinion, as are we all, and if I can't back it up then I can't back it up. For every person who doesn't like Claire (me), there's someone who does (her stalker). I will gladly take on anyone else's opinion, but won't be made to justify my own - nor do I expect anyone else too.

Corrie - OMG!!!
1) Why did Liz come out in her nightie and dressing gown showing quite so much cleavage?
2) Has Tracey had a personality transplant?
3) Will Bill and Audrey PLEASE stop kissing?
4) Again, I'm lost over the Frankie/Jamie thing. Why did she accept Danny's proposal? Apparently a lot more happens between J and Frank.

Happy Birthday Isi.
Hope you all had a lovely day yesterday. xxxxxxx

Sorry guys, I can't be bothered to write anymore at the moment. Maybe feel better later. Feel a bit stupid writing all this. Like, what I have to say matters? I think it's because of that person writing the comment yesterday. Her/his first post was really quite nasty I thought. I know blogs are in the public domain but I feel this person has violated my space and I don't like it. I'll have to get used to it I suppose as it may happen again.

Hello, I'm back - out of my fug...

One other thing....

Advice about your baby (babies) from strangers.

Does this annoy anyone else as much as it annoys me. I get it all the time. Could it possibly be a reflection on what a bad mother I am?!!!

Yesterday we were in Wagamama's having lunch with the boys, which was just total an utter chaos, but fun as well. We were feeding them bits of bread and a lot of it was going on the floor as a bowl of Ramen looks far more interesting when your almost one. The waiters kept sweeping up around us, which I thought was very rude and then one of them said 'the best thing for teething is raw vegetables' - totally out of the blue. John, clearly as peed off as me asked him how many children he had. Answer - None. So you read that in a book? Answer - no used to do a lot of babysitting. Me - a frozen bagel is actually the best thing. (I have never done this, just read about it). Waiter - Yeah, that too. Me (in my head) - Just f*ck offfffffff!

I would never give a friend baby advice, unless asked and certainly never a stranger. Is it just me? My favourite baby advice story is from Fran. The one where Ben was approached by 'A baby expert' (her own words) working in Baby Gap. I wonder if I'm more likely to get it because of the twins and I look like I need all the help I can get.
x

11th November 06

Judy
This is the girl on the photography course. I dislike her so much more today. Half way throught he class yesterday the tutor asked her if she was ok and she replied, 'Yeah, I get it I'm just bored.' *%$£"&*^%)@*&*^%% Bi-atch! We're all sitting there listening and he's doing his best to teach us and she says that. This is adult education not nursery school. I cannot believe how people behave sometimes. I wish she'd leave. She's a nanny and on the first day asked everyone if they were married and had kids. I do, but not everyone does and she replied 'I thought everyone here would be bored housewives.' What a charmer. On our final lesson we're going on a field trip to South Bank. I'll try not to push her in the Thames.

X-Factor
I don't really watch it. The only one I like is Leoni. She has an amazing voice. But I think those two little weedy blah milky prefect scottish children should GO! They are so awful and have about as much stage presence as a turd. How are they there? And Louis Walsh? Little insipid man. I also like Ray, but can't watch him sing as it makes me cringe.

Strictly Come Dancing
I have never watched this for two reasons - Bruce and Tess. Why doesn't Bruce retire? And she has the personality of an Amoeba. What does Vernon see in her? I can't imagine they have any witty banter and he is hilarious. Watched it a little last night, by mistake really. I want Claire King OUT! She is proper trailer trash.

Lorraine Chase
Just a quickie - did anyone see her on This Morning on Friday? Has she had plastic surgery? Her face looked weird.

10th November 06

Corrie
I have forgotton everything about this episode other than two things. Audrey and Bill pretending to be drunk walking down the alley (who lives on the other side of the alley and odd how we've never seen them) and Bill and Audrey kissing. Why? It amkes me feel queasy thinking about it. Maureen comes back soon and there's a row. I forgot all about her character, but she used to be married to Reg Holdsworth.
Is Bev coming out? I can't stand her. I have no sympathy for her at all, which I don't like. Liz has a new hair do and didn't she look very tanned? I had the sound down at the bit but assume they exchanged contracts on the pub.

Nothing on the TV.
There is never anything on. We've got cable and all I watch are re runs of friends, Dog the bounty hunter and sometimes re runs of Will and Grace, oh and informercials as long as it isn't excercise equipment. Polly mentioned how there was never anything on a Satuday night on it's-a-list-thing, but I think that goes for most nights. Although, I've just thought, I'm a celebrtity starts next week and I've always loved that. Jan Leeming, Toby Anstis, Jason Donovan, some random from Footballers wives. It's hard when there's cack all on as I haven't got the attention span to put on a DVD.

Babies Sleeping
This probably won't happen again for five years but last night the boys went to sleep at 7 and only woke once at 3.30am. That hasn't happened for about three months, maybe longer. The night before was awful. They must have been up about 10 times before midnight and then after that would not go back into their cots, so John and I take a baby each and I sleep in the spare room. Obviously because they slept I kept waking up or having dreams about them. I got really upset about the sleep thing as I'm convinced every other baby in the world sleeps through and that I've done something really wrong as a mother for this to happen. Mum said there was an article in the ES the day before about babies and how it's common for babies and toddlers not the sleep. Felt less awful.

Photography course homework
Did this last night and am not sure. We had to do a photomontage and I've had all week to do it, but I just couldn't think of anything. I did in the end and am not happy as it's small and whilst the tutor (Rick Snowley - he is getting funnier by the week) would never ridicule it, I know he won't be overly impressed. There's only one girl on the course I hate, which is good going for me. Large, sullen, South African know it all, who moans all the time and keeps telling the same story.

Magda
Better week with her this week. Last week was a mare. She was really quiet all week and I kept asking if she was ok... 'Yes, I am fine Sally.' The on the Friday she took the boys to a playgroup and was half an hour late back. I had to text her and she said they were fine and that she had gone to the Polish shop. I was annoyed as it was lunch time. So she comes back and I was a bit peed off and she kept saying 'What is the matter Sally?' In her usual gestapo like tone, so eventually I tell her and she burst into tears. Great. I feel awful, but think I'm right to be annoyed especially as she didn't let me know they were going to be late. Anyway half an hour later it transpires she's a bit down about a few things so I tell her to talk to me and not to be miserable and quiet. Then her purse gets stolen from being in her bag outside on the buggy. She says I only left it for 20 minutes and I'm like Magda this is London, it takes 20 seconds. When she first started we had a big chat about how London can be and how to be safe. Clearly went in one ear and out the other - which is a real personality trait of Magda. Anyway she seemed better this week.

9th November 06

Flat pack furniture
I've done it. All the boxes of bits and screws and alan keys are now proper looking bits of furniture. The final piece was made yesterday. A large set of drawers from Ikea. Whenever I'm making stuff, I'm always convinced there is a little business here. People always find doing this a nightmare so what if you paid someone to come and do it for you? But then you'd have to charge a fortune to make any sort of profit and it would need two of you (X, I thought of you), so in the end it would cost more to pay me to do it, than the piece of furniture initially cost. Anyway, it's all and the house looks almost normal.

Catherine Tate show
Mmmm, I really like her but this is clearly one series too many. When she does her characters it's like watching her doing an impression of her doing doing the characters - if that makes sense. They're so over the top. It makes me think of the point Ricky Gervais made in Extra's about people just laughing at the catchphrase. I think that's what's happening here. No one really laughs until she says 'How very dare you?' or 'What a f*cking liberty.' It's a shame as I do really like her.

Stenders
Can't watch it. The whole Honey/Petal/Billy storyline brings back too many painful memories. There was the whole DS scare with Ben when the boys were born. I just want her to love her little girl.

8th November 06

Corrie
I so don't understand the whole Danny/Frankie/Jamie love triangle. What is Frankie doing? And is it just me or does she dress more and more like Elsie Tanner with every episode?
AND! How much of a non episode was it last night? Jack Duckworth turning 70. So? And then the toast to him and Vera. I want to see Tracey and Charlie.
Also who is in charge of hairdressing behind the scenes? What is with Gails bouffant and Deidres' bad hair year? D's hair looks as if they do they front bit and nobody bothers with the back. Are they spending too much time on selecting the chain mail belts she wears?